I rationalize shop. I buy a dress because I need change for gum.Rita Rudner
Tag: funny
January 10, 2019
I’ve invented Twofacebook, the antisocial network. You start being friends w/entire world & defriend people one by one. Andy Borowitz As long as it’s friendly to the…… Read more “January 10, 2019”
Janaury 8, 2019
Albert Einstein discovered that a tiny amount of mass is equal to a huge amount of energy, which explains why, as Einstein himself so eloquently put it…… Read more “Janaury 8, 2019”
November 12, 2018
Accept who you are. Unless you’re a serial killer.Ellen DeGeneres
May 25, 2018
I just like the beaches in the summer, man. -Rob Gronkowski Just like how you like to read books Gronk? I kid. Happy unofficial start to…… Read more “May 25, 2018”
May 12, 2018
One thing that I do find really sexy is a girl who’s good at crossword puzzles. – Chris Pine So Chris, would you like to see my…… Read more “May 12, 2018”
December 15, 2017
Stoked for my first Dungeons & Dragon session. Wish Camilla (my half-elf wizard character) and me much luck!
December 12, 2017
My father always said, “Be the kind they marry, not the kind they date.” So on our first date I’d nag the guy for a new dishwasher.…… Read more “December 12, 2017”
December 9, 2017
I have Social Disease. I have to go out every night. If I stay home one night I start spreading rumors to my dogs. -Andy Warhol Andy, you…… Read more “December 9, 2017”
November 30, 2017 #TBT
Anybody find this video a smidge above “super hilarious”? Happy Thursday! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7EChnZTJicw
November 28, 2017
I’m a tidy sort of bloke. I don’t like chaos. I kept records in the record rack, tea in the tea caddy, and pot in the pot…… Read more “November 28, 2017”
November 8, 2017
I love cold weather. -Seth Rogan Temperature dropped twenty degrees last night and will continue to drop to 45 degrees by 5 PM. Cold weather why has…… Read more “November 8, 2017”
November 6, 2017
Way, way back in the day, like in the 1990s, if you wanted to tell everyone you ate waffles for breakfast, you couldn’t just go on the…… Read more “November 6, 2017”
October 30, 2017
Max: But everyone here knows that Halloween was invented by the candy companies it’s a conspiracy! Allison: It just so happens that Halloween is based on the ancient feast…… Read more “October 30, 2017”
October 9, 2017
It’s like, how did Columbus discover America when the Indians were already here? What kind of shit is that, but white people’s shit? -Miles Davis, Miles: The…… Read more “October 9, 2017”
